1) Tea lights make lovely table decorations, as do mini marshmallows. Put them together and you have a really fun activity for the sober people at the table who try their luck at toasting marshmallows on plastic forks.
2) Tea lights are a bad decor option anywhere near those who
are drinking out of wine bottles instead of wine glasses. Especially when there are loose napkins on
the table.
3) When planning your menu, come up with foods that can
serve more than one purpose. Table
decorations can be edible (see number 1.)
And onion soup can come in handy when you need to douse flaming napkins
(see number 2.)
4) It might not be a good idea to send a really drunk guy to
pick out a hostess gift, although to be perfectly honest, I thought the light
blue wicker bassinet filled with chocolate and topped with a large, fluffy
teddy bear was absolutely adorable.
5) Tighty whiteys, when worn over your suit pants and with
your suit jacket, are apparently suitable attire for the Purim seuda, as long
as you don’t mind being forever known as “Underwear Boy.”
6) Having a garbage can in the room makes it easier to clear
off used paper plates. Placing it,
uncovered, near the highly inebriated guests was a stroke of brilliance. Not only don’t they care that they are
sitting next to the garbage, but it came in handy when one of those present decided
to upchuck. Repeatedly.
7) If you will be hosting a bunch of people who will be
imbibing copious quantities of liquor, invite that friend or relative who
always runs to take care of, and clean up after, the guy who is tossing his
cookies. He will be worth his weight in
gold.
8) If someone does throw up on your driveway, pouring water
over the pool of vomit on the asphalt does nothing to clean it up. It just gives you a larger, wetter, pool of
vomit on the asphalt.
