Only In Monsey?

Sorry, not complaining or ranting this time.

Spent my whole day buying Pesach food. Stores were crowded, lines were long - you know how it is. I was waiting on line in the fruit store, doing absolutely nothing valuable with my time when I noticed a plastic container taped to the register. In the container, was a Tehillim with a little sticker on the front instructing you to please make sure to return it to the register. So instead of just standing on line doing nothing, I knocked off my Tehillim for the day.

Don't know about you, but it really made me smile!

And You Guys Think I Need Hobbies?

I know. You prefer when I rant and rave.

But this was too funny not to share.

Do It Yourself

Did you know that if you buy a pair of piercing earrings in Wal Mart they give you the piercing gun for free as long as you're over 18?

No, I am NOT making this up.

Someone Must Have Been Very Thirsty!

tHat's Entertainment!

So, by a show of hands. Who thinks I should go along when the boys go hat shopping?

Am I better off crying in the store? Or crying at home while they're out shopping and then crying again when they come home? And anyone who's going to suggest I not cry at all doesn't know me at all!

And isn't there some law that if you have such cute, round cheeks, you're too little to wear a hat?

Child/Spousal Abuse

Yes, I've finally done it. Something worse than not using my oven for three weeks because I don't want to have to kasher it.

I didn't serve anything fleishics Friday night. Onion soup. Poached salmon. Yum!

Who's ready to call the authorities on me?

Am I Too Old For These?

What do you think?

Shechiyanu Time!

So here's the plan. I don't use the new oven until Pesach so that I don't have to clean it. Yes, I know it's self cleaning, but that doesn't mean I won't obsess over every little nook and cranny.

What do you think - am I being practical or completely unreasonable?

The Morning After

Take as needed...

PARTY Time!!

A Freilichen Purim from the entire Rant family!

Baruch Dayan Emes

That's it. I think my oven is finally dead. I am soooo sad! Yes, I know it was older than me. But even if this forces us to finally extend the house, it means I am oven-less for a very long time.

All comments about extending or helpful suggestions will be deleted. Just want sympathy! (And my Kol Noar CD.)

Hamantaschen From Outer Space!!

Are these ugly or what? No, I didn't burn them. They are chocolate hamantaschen with marshmallow filling. The white ones on the left have fluff for filling. But it kept sticking to the spoon, so I tried using actual marshmallows - those are the ones with the ugly brown filling on the left. Guess we'll just have to eat the ugly ones!

But I got to thinking - let's hear some creative hamantasch ideas - marshmallow fluff is getting too hard to work with. I know what Uncle Rant would come up with - fleishic hamantaschen!

Contagious Diseases

Anyone know where the Pinki are? We haven't heard from either of them in ages!

(For non-Faska's out there, Pinki is plural of Pinchas.)

And fyi, that picture was titled "infection". It just kinda called to me.

You're Never Too Old...Or Are You?

With Purim right around the corner, we're all thinking about Purim costumes. Except y3k (not y2k!) who is dull, a spoilsport and doesn't believe in dressing up for Purim.

So, here's a point to ponder. At what point in time are you too old to dress up for Purim? What costumes are NOT appropriate for Purim? (Remember guys, this is a G rated blog. Don't make me delete your comments!!)

Who Wants A Drink??

Saw these in the store the other day and it was just a Kodak moment. So glad I happened to have had my camera on me!




Ummm...you think they have any other kind of cups?

Mishloach Manos: Need Help!!

Ok, guys, so I'm thinking soup. Maybe Split Pea. Uncle Rant and y2k's favorite!!

But I need something else with it. Was hoping to find small packs of those little fishy croutons, but no one has them. (I hit 5 stores today.) I could buy croutons and repack them. I could make my own. I could make Challah, but prefer not to. I saw individual packets of melba toast, but that seemed so nerdy!

So, what goes with soup? Doesn't have to be Split Pea. Maybe Onion Soup? (No, no cheese. Can't deal with that. Besides, need to use fleishic pots - they're bigger.) I'm flexible on the soup. Anything but Chicken Soup.

Any ideas, anyone?

A Gutten Chodesh, Everybody!

Hey, it's party time!!

You know what they say about the family that drinks together???

Time to Rant...

Come on, you guys would really rather hear me kvetch than just read/watch cute stuff I find on the web? I find that hard to believe.

But it one fuzzy brother of mine wants to hear me complain, you all have to suffer.

Here you go: Purim is coming. Don't get me wrong. I'm really happy about that. But I am so tired of buying candy and cookies that nobody wants to eat. (And yes, Aunt A, I'll save you the comment - there is always Tomchei Shabbos cards.)

So here are my themes for this year:

Kids: Buy soda, use up whatever candy we have in the house. No, not last years candy. Ok, maybe just a little of it.

Everyone Else: Here's my idea. I want to make something that people will actually want to eat. Last year it was cholent. This year, I'm looking for something easy, non perishable and not going to spill if I send it to Queens. Oh yeah, and cheap, too.

Anyone have any ideas?

Anybody Got Any Herring?

I know a few somebody's who would be happy to reuse those toothpicks!

Hail to The Rebbe?

And you guys think I have too much time on my hands????

Do A Mitzvah!

In the better late than never department:

Help George Bush get his stuff back to Texas.

You can help him by visiting HelpBushPack.com

Make sure to click around and see what you can do!

What I Did Over My Summer Vacation

Ooh, ooh! I want to send my kids here!!!

What Happens When You Leave Your Kid Alone

My first thought was, wow, what a great punishment! Why didn't I ever think of videoing my kid's misbehavior and posting it on youtube? But the more I watch, the more I thought it was child abuse.

Sorry, guys. The video was taken down, B'H. You snooze, you lose!

The Wonderful World We Live In

Now available from Amazon.com for only $58.99: Playmobil security checkpoint toy.

One reviewer's opinion:

I was a little disappointed when I first bought this item, because the functionality is limited. My 5 year old son pointed out that the passenger's shoes cannot be removed. Then, we placed a deadly fingernail file underneath the passenger's scarf, and neither the detector doorway nor the security wand picked it up. My son said "that's the worst security ever!".

Believe it or not, this isn't a joke. (Or at least the website I found this on says it isn't. I didn't have time to actually check all of these out, but feel free and let me know.) Playmobil has a whole bunch of similar items, including the Playmobil Police Checkpoint, a SWAT Helicopter, a SWAT Police boat, a Radar patroller, a police station with a jail cell, and police headquarters, complete with an interrogation room. (You can buy an optional prison cell accessory). Don't forget the jewel thief kit!

Miami Boys Choir: Chinese Dance Class

You just can't make this stuff up!