Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Roadkill Cafe

So years and years ago I was working out in Basking Ridge, New Jersey. And there was this huge story on the news about a restaurant that was peeling roadkill off the pavement, cooking it and serving it. There was some really funny stuff that went around including "menus" from "The Roadkill Cafe", (you kill 'em, we grill 'em!)

Living up here, we have more than our share of squirrel pizzas, as my boss's daughter used to call flattened animals on the road. When I see them, I call the Department of Highways and they come and take care of them before certain-children-of-mine-who-shall-remain-nameless scream and either cause little old ladies to fall flat on their faces, or refuse to wear their shoes ever again because they accidentally brushed up against a dead bird.

But here's my question: what does the Highway Department do with all our flattened friends? Do they get turned into itty-bitty squirrel fur gloves? Do the bigger items end up on someone's menu? And if they just dump them, you think they end up in the compost bin at one of our local farms, so that they fertilize the fresh, local produce that we all love to pick?

Just some food for thought. Or not.

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

So as I was reading this post, one thought jumped out at me: Who's your boss?

Anonymous said...

Hmm, I knew there was a reason no one else makes cholent like Josh...

Anonymous said...

Orange mulch....

Or,

they put them in the hagadah.

Who Me? said...

My boss was a guy named Joe Conron, and living in Queens at the time, I was unfamiliar with the concept of roadkill. I remember him telling me his daughter calls roadkill "squirrel pizzas." Isn't it nice that my mind is full of so much trivia?

Orange mulch? Hagada? Uncle A, you lost me!!

And yes, Uncle Rant's cholent is very special...

Anonymous said...

Uncle A. even lost ME!!! (I knew the day would come eventually)

Anonymous said...

Orange mulch: like the stuff you put in front of your house every year.

Hagadah: k'dei sheyishalu hatinokos.

Anonymous said...

http://smalldeadanimals.com/

Anonymous said...

All I can tell you, is NOT in the compost, because that only gets things that grow

Who Me? said...

Oh well. The secret is out. I don't know how to compost.

There goes my image!

Anonymous said...

I don't compost either. Mogo does!

Who Me? said...

Ok, so no roadkill in the compost heap. Roadkill gets buried in the tomato patch?

Who wants some yummy salad?????

Anonymous said...

Ok, I am SOOOOO staying single.

Who Me? said...

Oddly enough, y2k, not all married guys compost. Or bury dead creatures in their veggie patch.

Anonymous said...

ah-hem. no one had 2 know what i did 2 bobbi. and it wasn't on purpose 4 all those that r wondering.

Shir Chadash said...

We buried Howard in the zucchini patch! I was five. It was sad.

Who Me? said...

Umm...who was Howard and what state to do we need to contact the authorities in?