Sunday, March 22, 2009
Child/Spousal Abuse
Yes, I've finally done it. Something worse than not using my oven for three weeks because I don't want to have to kasher it.
I didn't serve anything fleishics Friday night. Onion soup. Poached salmon. Yum!
Who's ready to call the authorities on me?
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23 comments:
I know one sister who WON'T be calling the authorities on you.
We had split pea soup, fleish tacos (sans cheese -
"parve" cheese is nasty), chicken wings, and potato kugel.
Going for seriously non-traditional.
Sure I will - for sister abuse! Where was my invite? Don't forget, I have known you longer than any of them have. And here I was just going to invite you for a meal on Shabbos..
Mr. Tom -
I don't think you're the person in Florida who serves the um, well, "wierdest" meals.
We don't do "weird".
We do different.
If ya' want weird I've some relatives homes to send you to. :)
why wasnt i invited?!?!
u werent home
Hey, in Florida, they serve alligator. Salmon is much better.
I think. Unless anyone out there knows different?
Kosher alligator?? I'm just glad that you didn't invite me!
Kosher alligator? Never said Kosher.
Remember those ices I served you once for Shalosh Seudos? They didn't say Kosher, either!
Hey, you too? Remember the time I served him ice cream for dessert one Shabbos and he said it didn't taste Parve? And it wasn't?
(Who's coming to me for shabbos now?)
If you would like to attempt a kosher scheita on a 'gator, feel free. I'll be standing waaaay back with the EMS crew.
Note: out in the boonies they also eat snakes, lizards, and possums.
Tom: We don't use the "s' word on blogs that I read, remember?
In a contest between MOGO and an alligator, I'm not sure who I'd put my money on.
Actually, it's an interesting thought. Any opinions?
MOGO is meaner, but the alligator has bigger teeth.
You can come down here and have a go at it to see who wins. I'll bring the popcorn.
You can start with one of small ones that lives in swamps in the local park. They're only around 6' long.
Hey, popcorn! Have fun, bro, we'll save you some. Or the alligator, depending on who wins.
There are alligators in your local parks???
That is just sick!!!!!!!
It's the only park without a resident bum population. Sleeping next to the larger bodies of water is NOT recommended.
People feed the gators. I've seen seriously stupid parents let their little kids come within a couple of feed of a 4-5' gator to feed it.
You would love this place. The brown spiders build enormous webs in the trees over the hiking paths in the woods. Hundreds of them. The spiders are bigger than my hand. Big meaty guys. Harmless as long as you don't bother them. Took my sister on a walk once when she visited. Forgot to mention the spiders. When she saw my kids gathering branches to brush away the low hanging webs she asks why? They just pointed straight up.
Boy, can my sister scream.
And you live there why???
Wife likes it. Need I say more?
I hate: the lack of job opportunities, lack of educational opportunities (me and my kids), lack of culture (unless you like latin music and clubing with euro-trash and crack head models), climate (I HATE the #$%^& hot weather!!!), almost non-existant public transportation, corrupt government (I should know - I work for them), etc.
But I'm not bitter or anythin...
Tom: That's pretty funny, sorry we missed it. Oh, wait, we didn't missi it; we were wondering what that scream was. And thanks for not mentioning the s-----s.
Hey, Tom. Sounds like you're almost mad enough to go at it with the gator. And win.
Odds on Tom, anyone?
And who's selling snacks?
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