They're talking about a "Fat Tax" in New York. Tax items that are fattening and unhealthy. If you want to eat junk food or have a Coke, you're gonna have to pay extra. I think it's a great idea. But they didn't take it far enough. There are so many other possibilities. Imagine this:
Ugly Tax: Tax cosmetics and other personal care items. If you're not attractive the way G-d made you, it's gonna cost you.
Idiot Tax: Tax Cliff's Notes, Barron's Review Books and all SAT Review Courses. You ought to be smart enough on your own. If not, pay up!
Tall Tax: Clothing for tall people ought to cost more. More fabric, more labor. Why do short people have to subsidize clothing for six footers?
Cutesy Tax: Hello Kitty. Lisa Frank. Smurfs. Need I say more?
People Who Eat In My Car Tax: It's my car, not your kitchen. Keep your crumbs out!
So many more, but so little time...
Ugly Tax: Tax cosmetics and other personal care items. If you're not attractive the way G-d made you, it's gonna cost you.
Idiot Tax: Tax Cliff's Notes, Barron's Review Books and all SAT Review Courses. You ought to be smart enough on your own. If not, pay up!
Tall Tax: Clothing for tall people ought to cost more. More fabric, more labor. Why do short people have to subsidize clothing for six footers?
Cutesy Tax: Hello Kitty. Lisa Frank. Smurfs. Need I say more?
People Who Eat In My Car Tax: It's my car, not your kitchen. Keep your crumbs out!
So many more, but so little time...
17 comments:
so basically, if you're not like me, you're being penalized.
how very narcissistic
How about a donkey tax, for keeping (un)domesticated wild animals in your house? (Riley is excluded, of course.)
well done yakov. very subtle.
and how abt instead of taxing stupid people we just send them back where they belong? to canada?
feminist tax; if you're not chivalrous, you should pay for it
How about just plain annoying tax? You bug me, you have to pay me.
Not that anyone would EVER have to pay me. I am the most tolerant person in the world!
yea but even the most tolerant person has a threshold that can be crossed...the question is, where is that with you? (evil grin)
How about a "calling on my cell phone tax"; you use my minutes,
you pay. And what was so important that you couldn't wait until I got home? (Shopping emergencies are obviously exempt.
Or a "called too early and woke me up tax", payable in chocolate?
And then, of course, the bad joke tax.
or the allowing foreigners to get green cards tax for allowing foreigners to pretend to be americans by either giving them jobs or marrying them? mail order brides can afford it. if u jumped the fence u shouldnt be here.
(thanx 4 the idea anonymous =-))
taxes for lousy driving in monsey including but not limited to:
1. not using a blinker
2. not slowing down and not using a blinker but whipping around a corner
3. broken lights
my favorite:
a tax on people who think because they were waiting for a while to make a left turn, that when the light turns red, they can still turn left even if the other way has a green light. How many near accidents have you witnessed at the corner of 306 and Viola?
sheesh
Mrs. Anonymous:
Actually, if you are already in the intersection waiting to make a left turn (like at Viola & 306), you ARE allowed to go after the light turns red.
And not using lights is sometimes by mistake.
how about for people who come to a complete stop and put on their blinker when going around a cyrve in the road?
y2k, who r u referring 2? Yitz or Pin?
How about a tax for someone who usurps my name, "Anonymous"!
Forget taxes - how about tax RELIEF for finding out that the "Anonymous" that I proved wrong was a different Anonymous?
i wasn't following these posts as they were written and now i'm very confused. i hope there's no tax for that...
Wait, if Anonymous isn't Aunt Anonymous, does that mean I have another reader?
I know who y2k is...but now I see a y3k...and I am confused.
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